NOVEMBRE

 nov. 1, 2023

E quando se ne andrà mi lascerà nella più totale DISPERAZIONE e un reticolo di cicatrici NEL FRATTEMPO  mi uccide Quanto aveva ragione Rilke il bello non è che il terribile al suo inizio

                                 UNTIL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN REALITY 

                           AND FANTASY IS NOT QUITE SO CLEAR ANYMORE

boh 6

The surprising quality of IT i'm unafraid unfazed supremely amused of everything that used to scare me silly OH PLEASE DON'T LET IT GO AWAY PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE never been like IT before

 

8?

It and nothing else How I'm striving to keep it

AND YOU come on down touch my life with BRILLIANCE 

               YOU COME ON DOWN!

10  Brividi deliziosi di stanotte che giorni psichedelici

SARA' COMPLETA LA MIA FELICITA' OGGI ?

OH YOU COME ON DOWN I BEG YOU 

si 

                                                         YOU I'M SO SORRY 

                      ALTRO CHE RABBIT HOLE QUESTO E' UN BUCO NERO 

Isn't there a line to hold? CANT GO ON BLUNDERING like this about the muddled borderland of WORLDS a line somebody throw me a line a lifeline

It hits still, like a knife in the chest that knife at the crucifixion

                                      CANT BE OF TWO MINDS LIKE THIS 

                                           they're too far one from the other

                                            I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING

                                                          that isn't IT

                            A LINE TO HOLD I'M GONNA SEARCH FOR IT 

2. LIFELINE

 

I went

Dehydrated undernourished as well as naked I offered myself

Shaken trembling and very still inside

NO LINE NO ANSWER NOTHING

I came back

Thirsty hungry spent 

 

 3.I WISH I WAS THE FIRE

 

Who got your blessed medal

Who got your pinkie ring

Who got your wedding band

Who got your black rimmed glasses

 

Who got you even teeth

Who got your perfect nipples

Who got the spring in your gait

The fire had it all and then more

 

 

Mio dio che cosa violenta cannibalica 

 

  nov. 19                                              I'm so sorry 

                                                                 BUT 

                                         FOR A LIFETIME I'M GRATEFUL 

                   è dappertutto - dappertutto

                                      it's eating me alive it's everywhere

                se solo potessi rimandarlo indietro se solo volessi e chi vorrebbe

                                   it's eating me alive but I'm never alone

Nessun giorno più perfetto di oggi - arriveranno giorni pesanti o imperfetti ma VIVO per giorni come questo e che dire FOR A LIFETIME I'M GRATEFUL